60 Days of Amy

I've decided to take a break...  from all dating.  Yes, I said it.  And the goal is approximately 60 days, which brings me to mid April, to avoid all sorts or types of pursuing.  


The rules include:  not allowing myself to pursue anyone, not allowing anyone to pursue me, no texts, no calls, no giving out my number, no taking another's number, etc.  Easy enough, right?


The point of this all is to get back to the basics.  As in, what makes me tick?  What's important in my life?  It's time to put myself first again and wake up everyday to do the things that make me happy.  I've gained some very important girlfriends in my life who I immensely enjoy spending time with, and I'm finally to a point where I'm content on my own, so why not enjoy this time alone??  


This is Amy time.  All about me.  I'm not ashamed to admit or tell the world.  Because this will only make me stronger on the other side.  And who knows... maybe I'll have so much fun that I might extend it?!  Stay tuned my friends...

Just another one of 'those' weeks

(big sigh)


I'm unsure how to write or what to write this morning.  My mind is in a million different places and it is in desperate need of a roadmap.  But I was able to start my morning off perfectly.  I have this love for getting up early, when it's still dark, before the world is awake, it's quiet & calm, and just starting my day with a nice cup of coffee & breakfast while it's still outside.  (This love is only available M-F).


I am feeling helpless & fearful for a dear friend of mine.  And I keep praying for her because I can't do anything else.


Ever wonder why we keep going back to certain things or people in our lives wishing for different outcomes?  Me too.  For the last several months, I've been doing that with somebody, but it ended this week, and I promise to not go back.  A little heartbreak, a lot of clarity.  And even more 'ME' time to come in the near future.  The gratitude for my dear friends in my life is overflowing to get me to this point.


And this, my friends, is where I will start my day & press onward.

Bieber Fever

So I took the plunge, and saw the teenage heart throb Never Say Never movie, showcasing Justin Bieber's road to stardom as a musician.  Granted, besides my girlfriends and a few moms in the theatre, I was by far one of the oldest people in the theatre.  But for about 2 hours on a random Sunday night, I felt like I was 16 again.

I've never been a huge fan of his music, but I will say that I was more than impressed with his upbringing in a small town from Canada, his family values & morals, and more importantly, his drive for his love of music.  That child had major talent from a very young age; never forced by anyone to continue, but rather his pure gifts drove him to keep moving forward.  But while that popular rising star life seems so glamorous, the movie did a great job showing what he's had to give up in his life to be where he is.  I have even more respect for him now, because even I forgot how young he really is and what a different life he's living than others his age.  And I will now admit, I really do like his music!

His performance at the AMA's in 2010 was one of the first songs that caught my attention, and I continue to love it to this day.  Please take a few minutes to listen if you haven't heard it already.  And for all the Bieber haters, I call it jealousy.  Bottom line is he's one talented little individual and I hope he stays innocent & pure for a very long time.

Valentine's Day... for those who have a love/hate relationship with it

Let's face it.  When you're in love, you can't wait for this day to come around, once a year, a holiday with no purpose other than to spoil your sweetheart (or get spoiled).  You can't wait to wake up, just to see what will come of the day.  As the work day goes on, you see other women receiving flowers or gifts, one by one, the smiles and oohs & awwws (gag).  And you just can't wait for your turn.


Then there's some who, just hope that maybe that certain someone in your life, who you haven't quite determined the 'status' of your relationship/dating journey yet, may surprise you, and life would turn right side up in an instant, that all of a sudden, you're in love!


And then there's the rest, who have to watch all of the surprises & laughter & smiles, and have to remember that they're not going to receive a darn thing, they get to go home to an empty & quiet house, crack open a bottle of wine, turn on the TV to only find sappy love movies on every channel, and if they're lucky, they might even crank up the ole oven to bake a frozen pizza.


I can say I've been in all three of these positions at one point or another and I can't honestly say that I prefer one over the other.  But what I have definitely learned throughout many years of love & heartbreak, is that me alone can make myself truly happy.  Happiness comes from your inner soul & being, not from a dozen red roses that are miserably overpriced.  As much as I desire to be in love, I know that when I wake up every morning that I will determine my own destiny of happiness.  And besides that, I've also learned the major difference between being lonely or alone.  


So this weekend as I scroll through the TV lineup and all I see are love sick movies, I will press on to make myself happy & alone, not miserable & lonely.  I picture these feelings on the same page as those who desire to be a mother, but find themselves without children on mother's day.  But it's alright, because my day will come, it's just not time yet.

There's a first time for everything!

First & foremost, I will preface what I’m about to share with…  this is my first attempt to blog.  I am looking forward to imperfections, opinions, and whatever else may make its way through this site.  But let’s remember one thing, this is my blog.  And not yours.  So sit back, enjoy, read, comment, think, learn, don’t, whatever you feel like, but more importantly, welcome and hope you enjoy this new ride with me!